Short Story Sunday: Trying To Be Like Everyone Else

Jordan used to think fitting in was something you either figured out early or never did at all.

By the time he reached middle school, it felt like everyone else had already learned the rules. What to wear. How to talk. What to laugh at. Who mattered. Jordan watched closely, trying to understand how it all worked.

He noticed how quickly opinions shifted depending on who was around.

Someone would say one thing in a small group and the opposite in a larger one. Jokes that felt uncomfortable still earned laughter. Silence, he learned, could draw attention just as fast as speaking up.

Jordan wanted to belong.

At first, the pressure was subtle. A comment here. A look there. A moment when he realized his interests did not quite line up with everyone else’s. He told himself it did not matter. That he could just keep those parts of himself private.

Over time, the pressure grew heavier.

Jordan started adjusting without fully realizing it. He laughed at jokes he did not find funny. He agreed with opinions he had not thought through. He stopped talking about things he enjoyed because they did not seem popular.

Each adjustment felt small.

But together, they added up.

Being around friends started to feel like work. He was constantly checking himself. Monitoring reactions. Making sure he did not say the wrong thing or stand out too much. By the end of the day, he felt exhausted in a way he could not explain.

What bothered him most was the quiet feeling that he was losing himself.

Jordan missed being honest. He missed speaking freely. But the fear of being excluded felt stronger than the discomfort of pretending. He told himself it was temporary. That fitting in now would make things easier later.

Still, something did not sit right.

The turning point came during a moment that was not dramatic, but deeply uncomfortable.

A group conversation shifted toward making fun of someone who was not there. The jokes were sharp. The laughter was loud. Jordan felt the familiar pressure to join in.

He smiled.

But he did not laugh.

Someone noticed.

The silence felt heavy. Jordan’s heart raced. He waited for the reaction he feared. Being called out. Being labeled. Being pushed away.

Instead, something unexpected happened.

Another person changed the subject. The moment passed.

Later, someone pulled Jordan aside and told him they appreciated that he did not join in. That comment stayed with him longer than he expected.

For the first time, Jordan questioned the idea that fitting in required abandoning himself.

He began paying attention to how he felt after different interactions. He noticed that pretending left him drained, while being honest left him calm, even when it felt risky.

Slowly, Jordan started pulling back from the performance.

He spoke honestly when it mattered. He laughed when things were actually funny. He stopped forcing himself into spaces where he did not feel respected.

Not everyone stayed.

Some friendships faded quietly. Others grew stronger. A few surprised him by feeling more genuine once he stopped trying so hard.

Jordan learned something important.

Fitting in is about blending. Belonging is about being accepted.

And belonging, he realized, starts with accepting yourself.

⸻

Reflection Questions:

1. Have you ever felt pressure to change who you are to fit in?

2. What parts of yourself do you hide around others?

3. How does pretending affect how you feel afterward?

4. What does belonging mean to you?

5. Where do you feel most like yourself?

Youth are encouraged to share their reflections by emailing MyStory@3JYouth.org